Are You A Victim? Speedy Steps You Must Take before it’s too late (STEP 6)

LEGAL DOCUMENTS

-       Prepare a temporary bag, and its content mostly should be your Identity card, your credit card (that’s the one for your private individual account), legal documents of you and your children such as marriage certificate, birth certificates, health, house and vehicle insurances, travelling passports and others.

-       PHOTOCOPIES! If you can lay hands on the original without his awareness, then fine but you wouldn’t want another aggression from him after he discovers some documents are missing. Photocopies of these documents are okay. They still show you are the owner of whatever details are written on them.

-       You may be thinking, what is the importance this?  Do you prefer to flee without anything valuable on you? Are you ready to let him take it all thus dominating your life even when you are no longer with him? There have been tales of many abusive partners still manipulating their victims because they are the only one with access to the documents.

Few years ago during my younger sister civil wedding, the registrar openly told my sister, as he was handling over the marriage certificate that she should hold on to the certificate with her entire strength as if her life depends on it.  Everybody laughed. They found it funny but I understood the registrar.  He is a man and he knew much about the effect of losing such certificate.

I advise you to keep documents far away from the home you share with your abusive partner. I repeat; photocopies are better off than nothing. The moment you start observing conflict and consistent quarrels between you, get out the documents you knew you dare not joke it. Look for safe deposit office or close relation or friend (someone you can trust), and tell them to keep the papers for you.

Just be ready!

Are You A Victim? Speedy Steps You Must Take before it’s too late (STEP 5)

JOINT BANK ACCOUNT

-       If you have a joint bank account with your partner, now is the time for you create an individual account for yourself and you must do it secretly. Do not let the bank statement be sent to your home. Give the address of trusted relative and friends who will be receiving the account statement on your behave while you can go often to check. Never make the mistake of bringing the statements into your home, you never can tell what would happened if your partner sees it.

-       Having a separate account is very vital. It saves you so much hell of troubles that you have never prepared for.  In a joint account, there is every possibility that your partner can block your access to it. If he is the major financial, he would do all it take to punish you for deserting him and one of them is placing embargo on the bank account.

-       Individual account gives you liberty. It relieves you of unnecessary headaches. Another bonus of having individual account is you are independent. You are the only one who determines what goes in and comes out of the account. It does not matter how little amount of money you have in there. What is important is your financial security during your moment of separation.

Are You A Victim? Speedy Steps You Must Take before it’s too late (STEP 4)

-       Call the Police. The law enforcement agents are there to help you. It is their duty to protect you, to ensure that you are at safety. When you keep silence on all the abuses your partner inflicted on you, then you are in total danger. The only way you can save yourself is to talk out. Do not think that by keeping quiet that you are helping the situation. In fact, you worsen it the more.

-       Always have a phone handy. Making phone calls is not supposed to be difficult anymore. All you have to do it, flee to a room where there is a phone, lock yourself in and dial for help. If you have informed the Police ahead of time about your partner and what you go through in, they will be ready for you at all time.

-       Do not be afraid of the Police. Never think they are going to give you away. They are the first contact in this situation and you must not avoid them if you want to stay alive.

-       What if you don’t want to alert the Police but a close friend? This is no problem. Just remember to have your phone ready in any room you flee to during the attack.